Saturday, December 31, 2011


I love Numerology.  I love numbers.  But not math.  Or physics. 

2011 was my 9 Personal Year, which means things coming to an end.  And, in truth, that happened.  I lost friends.  I broke up with my boyfriend.  I finished community college.  And, to top it all off, I finished the most exhausting novel I've ever written.  But it's the one I'm definitely most proud of.  (It's 27 chapters and I finished it on the 27th.  Sign?)

I'm looking forward to next year.  It's my 1 Personal Year, which means the cycle starts over.  Things begin.

I have 2 New Years' resolutions that I intend to keep just to myself.  They're my secrets, my internal goals.  I also have 3 goals I don't mind sharing with you.

1.  Write.  But not just write.  Finish the two novels I have mapped out.  Start the (or finish, depending on how long the first two novels take) Stranger in the Mirror sequel.

2.  Believe In life.  In love.  But most importantly, in myself.  Take chances.  Remember that life is a gift and that I am an incredibly lucky human being just to be alive.

3.  Watch.  Ducks games, obviously.  As much as I can.  And when I can't, listen to them online, in the car, however I can.  We have yet to start a streak, but I can feel it coming.  Believe in them.  Support them.  And, more than anything, never, ever give up on them.

So, in total, 5 Resolutions.  5 also happens to be my life path number, by the way.

See?  It's all in the numbers. 

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Miracles, Christmas and Otherwise

First off, let me start by wishing each and every one of you happy holidays.  Whatever you celebrate, I hope you're happy, warm, and safe.

Today, I want to address miracles since Christmas is tomorrow and nearly every Christmas movie has some version of a miracle.  Of course, I want to make it clear that I'm not trying to say miracles occur only during Christmas or only for those who celebrate Christmas.  Miracles can happen to anyone at any time anywhere.

First off, let me start by saying wholeheartedly that I believe in miracles.  I tend to view them, however, in a similar way I view love: I believe in love but it's hard for me to imagine falling in love any time soon.  Same with miracles.

The more I got to thinking, the more I started realizing that perhaps I have to be part of my own miracle. 

Let me give you an example:  my Ducks aren't doing so great.  Like, they're losing way more than they're winning.  As fans, we want to see our team play, especially when we know there's such talent on the team.  Even if they lose, we want to see them play like they care.

That hasn't been happening recently.

It's easy to start to think negatively, to point the finger, to demand trades/firings.  I'm sure a lot of people go into the game thinking the Ducks are going to lose.  Our opponents might not even take us seriously anymore.


Here's the thing: I firmly believe that your beliefs can be put into actions, whether you're conscious of it or not.  If fans or players go into the game, waiting to make a mistake, waiting for the other team to score, it's going to happen. 

What the team needs now, in my very humble opinion, is support.  Every time I flick on the television, I believe with all my heart that they're going to win.  Every time I step into the Honda Center, I believe with all my heart that they're going to win.  There have been a couple of times I've caught myself cursing the other team or yelling at our players (yes, I yell at the TV.  Don't deny you don't do it too.), but when we do something great, I'll grumble, "Well, that's what you're paid for, isn't it?"

It's totally negative and totally not me!

A Christmas miracle would be for us to win our next game - a road game - against one of our rivals, the San Jose Sharks.  And then, win two in a row.  And then three.  And then start a streak.  But in order for a miracle to actually occur, we first have to believe in miracles and believe that we have the power to cause them. 

I can't play hockey, and even if I could, I couldn't go play goalie for Jonas Hiller.  That's his job.  But I can believe in him.  I can believe in every player, every coach, and every fan.

Instead of yelling at my television Monday night, I'm going to try and focus on the positives, even when we lose.  I might be only one person, but even a little can go a long way.   

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Expectations and Plotting

As you guys know, I'm a plotter.

With my current MS, I had a general idea of my characters and their story but I didn't actually write down specific plans of where I wanted this to go (besides a few notes to remind myself of important things).  About halfway through, I knew where I wanted to take the story, so I wrote one sentence plots for each character in each chapter.

Except, as I'm learning, my characters pull me in another direction in order to make sure I tell their story rather than their story through my point of view.

For instance, today, I was supposed to have my MC, Sophie, make up with her love interest Will after a tense fight.  Instead, she basically tells him she deserves better than some guy who runs away when things get tough, who doesn't build relationships with people so he doesn't get hurt.  Will's a good guy, don't get me wrong, and he'll continue to be Sophie's love interest.  But after writing that - being possessed by Sophie's spirit, more likely - I was so proud of her.

One day, you guys will read the scene I'm talking about, and I hope you're proud of her too.  It should be noted, though, that the scene wasn't exactly written in the stars, but Sophie made me write it down anyways.

Friday, December 16, 2011


Do you guys have favorite numbers, or numbers that just randomly keep popping up in your life?

Mine is 22.  There are many things that have happened to me on the 22nd of the month.  My uncle died on the 22nd.  My grandfather died on the 22nd.  Johny Dillinger was both born and died on the 22nd.  Goatboy and I broke up on the 22nd.

The 22nd of every month used to unnerve me.  It was never a great day.  Sometimes it wasn't horrible, but it was below normal.

November 30th, I turned 22.  Beforehand, I was worried.  I didn't want this year to be meh.  Below normal.  But the crazy thing is - this year has been pretty boss.

Take my birthday for example.  Last year, celebrating my 21st, I rented a small yacht and had 20 of my friends and a Jack Sparrow impersonator party and dance as we sailed up and down the harbor.  This year, my mom picked up a specially designed Ducks carrot cake (my favorite), my brother got me a couple of DVDs, and then me and my brother went to a Ducks game where we snapped a losing streak and won 4-1 over the Canadiens.  It wasn't a huge birthday, I celebrated it with pretty much my family, and I didn't do anything too special.  But it was perfect.  My team won.  My day was pretty good.  And I didn't have to worry about friends having fun and a boyfriend remembering that yes, today was my birthday.

Since then?  I've been happier.  Much happier than I was at 21.  It's like I'm owning 22, and it hasn't even been a month yet.

And now, I'm looking forward to the 22nd.  I can't wait to see what every new day will bring.  Because, for whatever reason, I know I'll be able to handle it. 

Try and catch me now, 21!